Sex is Definitely a Basic Instinct


Over a decade before I lost my virginity, with the uncrossing and crossing of her legs to reveal her private part, Catherine Tramell played by Sharon Stone in the 1992 movie titled​ ‘Basic Instinct’ had more or less sealed her legacy as a sex goddess and defined the sexuality of a 9 year old boy.


This was 1997 or so and the era of renting action movies for a paltry sum, watching it and returning them back. My kid brother and I had a knack for collecting money from daddy and renting a few Jet Li, Jackie Chan, Arnold Schwarzenegger classics.

This day I went to the movie place, a stone throw from my house alone to rent a movie and decided to rent “Basic Instinct” featuring Michael Douglas and Sharon Stone”. At the end of the movie, tons of sex scenes, and that famous leg crossing scene, plenty rewind-pause-play action, I had refused to return the movie. I lied to the owner that I lost it and gladly payed the penalty for a lost cassette.


I was barely 10 years but the desire to explore my body and that of the opposite sex was given a kick in the bum. Evolving into a teenager, sex and all that it came with was the most interesting thing in the World. It took me many years to delve into the deep end but sex to me was definitely a basic instinct as puberty set in.

Sex was a topic discussed in hushed tones in an era of no mobile phones, no social media, no iPhones, no home made or professionally produced pornography, no scantily dressed ladies, no g-strings and thongs and maybe no sugar daddies.

Now imagine this social media era with all the above and more being displayed like sirens on the top of a Police car. Sex is not only the most interesting thing in the World in the mind of a teenager in his century but something sooner or later they would venture into willingly, deceitfully or even forcefully.


Recently downloaded an app that shows the volume of searches for a particular keyword per month in Google and below are the figures for the following keywords.
Money had 1,220,000 searches per month in Google.

money search
God had 823,000 searches per month in Google.

God sex
Sex on the other hand, had 45,500,000 searches.

sex search
That means sex was searched over 35 times more than money and over 55 times more than God.

Now imagine!!!!!!

Everyone wants to know more about sex and that’s majority of teenagers experiencing puberty.

So when would parents and guardians stop this hypocritical “Don’t let a man touch you” and “Don’t get pregnant in my house” mantra we keep drumming into the ears of young girls. We lock them at home, keep them away male friends and forbid association with men but yet tell them next to nothing about sex. We task Biology teachers with the responsibility of teaching our kids about those vital organs on their bodies.

When would religious leaders, Pastors and the likes stop the defunct “Sex is bad”, “Sex is sin”, “Sex is an abomination”, “Abstinence is the only way” message we keep drumming into the ears of these inquisitive teenagers. We tell them sex is bad and a sin but hardly tell them why and as the kids they are, they would want to find out themselves.


It’s time we stop making teenagers feeling guilty for thinking about sex. It’s basic instinct. The same way animals have sex without training or porn videos, same with humans. If God didn’t want us to have sex, I’m sure men would have pipes for urination instead of the penis.

sex education

The same way a child waits 9 months to be ‘mature’ enough before it leaves the confines of his mother’s womb, that’s the same way sex should be delayed till one is mature enough to engage in it. That’s the message.

The key word is “Maturity and Safe Sex” not “Abomination and Marriage” (if he/she decides to wait to marriage. Fantastic).

Trust me, telling a teenager nothing about sex and admonishing (s)he to wait till marriage to experience sex is like telling a dog not to bite someone when hungry. Only a matter of time.



For Girls Only: Tampons are ALWAYS Better. Period.



I heard her screams from across the house and knew I had to swing into action and do something.

I was barely 17 or so and my little and only sister was experiencing the first visit of those bloody monsters and her discomfort was keeping me up all night.

Mum wasn’t home. Dad traveled. Kid brother was in school. As her big brother and only one at home, I had to act fast. I placed a call to a female friend who directed me to make her watery noddles with plenty pepper. I dashed into the kitchen, prepared as instructed and took it to her war-zone-looking room. Struggled to get her upright to eat the meal but surprisingly, the noodles solution worked, the pain subsided and she got some sleep (and so did I).


Over a decade after that experience, the word “period” gives me the chills because I am hemophobic (fear of blood) and contaminated blood at that. Worst!!!!!

I grew up with a distaste for anything pads, periods or menses but one thing caught my ‘inquisitivity’. How do athletes compete, dancers dance, swimmers swim, runners run, joggers jog while on their period? My curiosity led me to the discovery of tampons.


Sanitary pads are usually placed on the panty to absorb the flow of blood from the vaginal opening. Tampons on the other hand are designed to be inserted into the vagina during menstruation and absorb the flow even before it leaves the vaginal opening.

Due to ignorance, female folks especially in Africa have neglected the use of tampons in favor of sanitary pads for the following 5 myths:

1. “Sanitary pads are readily available while tampons are scarce”. This could be true but no one sees her period by surprise (maybe pregnancy but not your flow). Every lady should be able to calculate her flow and plan ahead. Buy, keep, calculate and use when due.

2. “I can’t pee if I have a tampon in me”. Some think one would have to remove the tampons to pee with the erroneous idea that pee and menstual blood comes out from the same exit. Wrong! The blood comes out from the main exit (vaginal opening) while pee comes out from the urethra opening. A tiny opening just above the vaginal opening.

3. “How can I stick something inside me for a whole day”.
The fear of sticking stuff in there scares some ladies. It might get lost inside. Lol. The tampons have a rope that you can use to pull the tampon out after the day’s use. Fear not…lol.


4. “It will make my vagina loose”.
Tampons are thin and if a baby that escape your hole and it will go back to it’s original size, how come a little tampon? Fear not.

5. “I am a virgin and the tampons could break my hymen”.
Well, this is still up to debate because anything inserted into the vagina of a virgin has the tendency of breaking the hymen but it is unlikely. The hymen is a stretchy tissue that surrounds or partially covers the vaginal opening.

When you insert a tampon for the first time, there are 3 scenarios that can happen:

  • Most likely the tampon will pass through without breaking your hymen.
  • Another likely scenario is your hymen will stretch to allow the tampon to pass through.
  • Unlikely scenario: Your hymen covers more of your vaginal opening and tears when you insert a tampon.

There are actually many normal every day activities that can tear your hymen including gymnastics, bike riding, horse back riding, exercise, and self-exploration. For some girls, the hymen is very stretchy and can even remain in tact after the first instance of intercourse.


So even if your hymen tears (very unlikely) – you are still a virgin. For more on the hymen, check the next article titled “The Dollar Price of Virginity in Africa”. (It’s still in my head so be patient till I pen it down…lol).

My girlfriend (ex now) decided against coming to sleep over because she was afraid her heavy flow would soil my bed. A thought a user of tampons wouldn’t bother about because tampons don’t move or shift like pads and absorb all they come in contact with. A girl seeing her period and wearing a tampon can even go out without undies.

Ladies, please it’s time to phase out sanitary pads, it’s the 21 century for crying out loud.  Comon!!!!! Please ALWAYS use a tampon. Pun intended.

Message from concerned gentleman.


Can you lose your virginity to a tampon? by The Period Blog. Click HERE to read

Picture Credit: Nsikak Effiong


69 Reasons Why Karma Is Not a B*tch


A million years ago in the Heavens, God created two angels for one purpose and named one “Sow” and called the other “Reap”. He called them both “Karma”.

Their sole function was to make sure people got exactly what they deserved​. Angel Sow took record of what people did, sent the information to God, God payed people back by sending Angel Reap to pass their rewards across to them.

Karma’s original function was to pay people “good” for doing good. Karma was to bless people for blessing others. Karma was to give people plenty for giving out some. Karma was to pay people back in millions for giving out thousands.

Karma became Heaven’s most dynamic duo and Earth’s most favorite Angels because more people began doing good because Karma was there to make sure their good came back to them with profit. James 1:17 says “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from God”.


The devil realizing that people got better and more blessed when they were blessing others decided to turn people against God by causing people to do bad.

Note: What people don’t realize is that God doesn’t do bad, it’s not in His nature. God doesn’t punish people (maybe in the Old Testament) and that was before Jesus died for our sins.
James 1:12 clearly says “Let no man say when he is tempted by God for God cannot be tempted with evil, neither tempteth he any man”.

God’s mission which is to give us abundant life (John 10:10b) only repays good for good and since it isn’t in His nature to pay people bad for bad kept quiet and the devil took over.


The devil’s mission on the other hand is to steal, kill and destroy (John 10:10a) decided to designate his own angels to pay people bad for their bad.

The word “Karma” originally God’s angels became known for bad things happening to people who did bad because as we all know bad news spreads faster than good news.

The secret about Karma is that when you do bad, you get bad in equal measure meaning if you lie against someone, someone will lie against you. But when you do good, you get good in a greater measure with interest. Luke 6:38 says “Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom.”


You have a two edged karma at your disposal. God’s karma and the devil’s karma. Do good and reap God’s karma with benefits. Do bad and reap the devil’s karma with ferocity.

The choice is yours.

Remember, “karma is a only b*tch if you are one” – Anonymous.

How To Make Good Luck Kiss Your Ass


A hunter wakes up in the morning and prays for a fruitful hunting day. He sets out to the forest, forgets his bullets, fails to set traps, ignores the behavior of the animals he is hunting and comes back home cursing his luck. In his confession, he blames his predicament on bad luck but in reality, the “lazy” hunter is simply ill prepared.

In the words of Eliyahu Goldratt, “Good luck is when opportunity meets preparation, while bad luck is when lack of preparation meets reality.”


Jesus fasted for 40 days and 40 nights in preparation for His ministry and when the opportunity arose, He was ready to trample on the devil, perform miracles and die for our sins.

Barack Obama prepared in advance and that coupled with opportunity made him President of the United States of America.

A pregnant woman is made to undergo physical, mental and often times especially in Africa, spiritual preparation before her due date so as to make childbirth as smooth sailing as possible.

We often pray for opportunities to arise. Some pray for jobs, others for businesses, others for a life partner and a bunch of others for children but how prepared are they for the above?


You can’t be praying for a job and not applying for jobs, practicing quantitative analysis questions for the aptitude test, preparing yourself for the interview by reading interview questions and answers.

You can’t be preparing for marriage and not be improving yourself, reading books on marriage and family, associating yourself with married folks and asking them questions.

Barbara Sher said, “The amount of good luck coming your way depends on your willingness to act”.

Good luck is a bird that everyone can catch depending on their willingness to act.

Don’t wait for shit to happen.
Prepare and make shit happen.

Pardon my French.



The Metamorphosis of Life with T.W.A


A wise man once said, “Be careful of your thoughts, for your thoughts become your words. Be careful of your words, for your words become your actions. Be careful of your actions, for your actions become your habits. Be careful of your habits, for your habits become your character.

T for Thoughts
When thoughts of defeat or hopelessness creep into your mind, caste them out with the word of God and the words of your mouth.


W for Words
When people offend or try to ruffle your feathers, don’t be the I-say-my-mind sort of human being, they don’t go far in life. Keep quiet, observe and make your move. As they say, silence is the best answer for a fool.


A for Actions
In the words of Martin Luther King, Jnr. “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy”.
Watch your actions (disposition, character, temperament).
When things are going well, don’t belittle others, don’t look down or trample on people or forsake your friends.
When things are not going well, don’t look down on yourself, don’t blame others for your predicament or question God
In everything gives thanks (1 Thessalonians 5:18).


Remember, your thoughts are more powerful than a pack of dogs, tame them. Your words are more potent than a bottle of poison, watch it. Your disposition is more radiating than the brightest bulb, check it.

Letter To Women: Love, Abuse and Death


“Can I ask you a question?”, she began. “How can you talk a girl out of an abusive relationship and she claims to be head over heels”.

“Show her evidence”, I replied with web links of abusive relationships that have led to death.

Click HERE for number one
Click HERE for number two
Click HERE for number three
Click HERE for number four
Click HERE for number five
Click HERE for number six
and so much more.

I then followed up the links with this statement, “These girls were in love but are now dead. If she’s in love and doesn’t want to leave an abusive relationship, she should get ready to go the same way those girls went. Simple.”

Sometimes I ask myself who’s more foolish, a girl that stays in abusive relationship or the man that abuses the girl. Both have some level of foolishness inherent in their brains. The girl that foolishly believes a man that beats her loves her and the foolish man that claims to love but abuses a lady.


For example, a lady who likes driving has a faulty car that no matter the repairs, the brakes keep failing. She decides to stick with the car with failing brakes because of the love she has for the car instead of saving her life and getting a new car. Please my people, is this love or foolishness?



Girls. Ladies. Women.

How many times did I call you?

Love is not by force!!! Did they swear for you with love? Staying in an abusive relationship isn’t because you love the man, you love the idea of being in a relationship and can’t stand starting afresh. What happens to yourself? Don’t you love yourself? Don’t you want to be happy? Aren’t you tired of using foundation to conceal your scares? Do you want to die young?

Real men don’t beat women. A real man will stand up for you when another man insults or abuses you not the other way around. Real men fight their fellow gender not the female gender.


Since I was born and now I am getting old, I have never laid a finger on a lady. No woman dead or alive can prove otherwise.

Then why would a man hit my sister or female cousins or my unborn daughters, that “man” should get ready to meet his Maker. What rubbish????!!!!!!!!


Think ladies. THINK!!!!!!

What Judging Others Says About You


Have you ever sat down and asked yourself a pertinent question, “am I holy?”

Is anyone holy? Is anyone without sin?

You judge someone not when you assess their position, but when you dismiss them as a person.


Jesus told people that their works were evil. Yet John 3:17 says that God didn’t send Jesus to condemn the world, but to save it. There is a difference between speaking a harsh truth and condemning. Condemning goes beyond saying “This is wrong” to saying, “I don’t like your kind of person and I don’t want you around anymore.”

It’s what you do after you tell someone the truth that determines whether or not you are condemning (judging) them. When Jesus told us the harsh truth about our sin, he brought us close. He made us, even as sinners, his friends.


Here are some signs you’re judging others:
1. You are more enraged at someone else’s sin than you are embarrassed by your own.
2. You refuse to forgive (or when you forgive you refuse to forget). Forgiveness means absorbing the debt and offering love and goodness in return.
3. You “cut off” those who disagree with you. This is the essence of judging. When you disagree strongly with someone—over something like faith or morality or politics—and because you can’t agree you cut them off.
4. You gossip. What makes gossip so dangerous is that you are judging someone without giving them the chance to explain themselves or change. At least if you judged someone to their face, they could do something about it.
5. You refuse to receive criticism. Why do you hate criticism? Isn’t it because you hate to admit that you have faults?
6. You refuse to correct put yourself in the person’s shoes. It’s easy to pass judgement when you haven’t been in that person’s shoes.
7. You write someone off as hopeless. Listen, we serve a Savior who raises the dead. It shouldn’t phase us if we think someone is hopeless. We are just as hopeless.


There is a balance here between grace and truth. So don’t judge others by withholding the truth. But don’t judge them by speaking the truth without grace. Instead, give them the grace and truth of the gospel.

And finally, remember that judging a person does not define who they are, it defines who you are.



7 Signs That You’re “Judging” Others by PASTOR J.D.. Click HERE to read

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