Why We Pass Out Gas (Fart/Mess)

a98612_rsz_farts

Growing up as a young boy, one thing we were taught (experience they say is the best teacher) was never to eat beans or boiled egg or a mixture of both during class hours. This was to avoid the ejection of flatus (medical word for gas generated in the intestinal tract). Flatulence or farting or as we called it back then “mess” is the passing of gas from the digestive system out of the anus.
It’s no secret that we all messed as young kids in class and as the professional messer, I knew how to make sure it didn’t make a sound by putting my butt cheeks together and releasing it intermittently (small small). After which I would act like nothing happened and wait for an innocent fellow to raise the first alarm by saying “who mess?” then the true messer (me) would accuse him of messing the mess. Those days were fun.
As a matter of fact, boys were always the ones who messed in class but when girls did, everybody had to leave the class. Girls mess smell far worst than boys mess maybe cause they are just beautiful beings..lol

On a serious note though, I have always belittled the importance of flatus (the gas we pass out) until recently I read the article of a man who was flown to India because he could not pass out gas through his anus which made the gas accumulate in his tummy and made it very big and almost killed him (which kind yeye sickness be this one sef, hian). That was when I realized how important farting is to human health.

What is fart?
Farts are usually trapped air that could come from a number of sources including air swallowed while chewing or drinking or gas produced by chemical reactions in our intestines. A typical fart is composed of 59% Nitrogen, 21% Hydrogen, 9% Carbon Dioxide, 7% Methane and 4% Oxygen. Only one percent contains Hydrogen Sulfide which contains the sulphur that makes farts smell bad.

Why does it make a sound?
Farts make a sound when they escape due to the vibrations of the rectum. The loudness may vary depending on how much pressure is behind the gas, as well as how the messer positions their butt chicks and sphincter muscles surrounding the anus.

Why does it smell bad?
The more sulfur-rich your diet is, the more terrible your farts will smell. Some foods contain more sulfur than others, which is why eating things like beans, cabbage, cheese, soda, and eggs can cause head ache generating mess.

Okay to hold it in?
According to a team of physicians from the University of Copenhagen, holding in gas can cause bloating, indigestion, heartburn and, sometimes, even pain, they noted. Intestinal distension resulting from trapped gas may also increase blood pressure and heart rate. Then there’s the mental stress of trying to keep the gas from escaping. The doctors’ advice: Just let it go.

How often do we fart?
According to Brenna Lorenz, author of Facts on Farts, the average person produces about half a liter of farts every single day, and even though many women won’t admit it, women do fart just as often as men. In fact, a study has proven that when men and women eat the exact same food, woman tend to have even more concentrated gas than men. (I said it, women’s fart smell more than men’s and I just found my prove..lol)

FACT: If a person were to fart continuously for 6 years and 9 months, they would produce gas with the equivalent energy of an atomic bomb.

Is it true that some people never fart?
No, not if they are alive. Everybody farts. Queen Elizabeth, Kim Kardashian, your pastor. Everyone farts.

Are farts flammable?
As stated above, the methane and hydrogen in bacteria-produced farts make your gas highly flammable. This is why some people think it’s a fun party trick to hold a lighter up to their bums and let one fly; doing so produces a big burst of flame, but is obviously very dangerous.

How long does it take for fart to smell?
Fart travel time depends on atmospheric conditions such as humidity, temperature, wind speed and direction. Also depends on the molecular weight of fart particles and distance between the fart transmitter and the fart receiver. Farts also disperse (spread out) as they leave the source and their potency diminishes with dilution. Exceptional conditions exists when the fart is released in a small enclosed area like an elevator or a small room or a car. These conditions limit the amount of dilution possible and the fact may remain in smell-able concentrations for a long time until it condenses on the walls.

Do people fart after death?
Here’s proof that you can’t escape passing wind, even after you’re dead! Up to three hours after the body dies, gasses continue to escape from both ends of the digestive tract, resulting in burping or farting noises. This phenomenon is due to muscles contracting and expanding before rigor mortis sets in.

 

There you have it but remember, when in doubt, fart it out. I wish that you stay alive to fart for many years to come. AMEN

 

References:
1. Fart Facts: 10 Facts About Farting by Beverly Jenkins
2. Facts on Facts by Brenna Lorenz
3. Holding in intestinal Gas by Berkeley Wellness

10 Reasons Why Girls Like Bad Boys

bad-boy-images-hd

From an early age, as far back as early Secondary school I discovered that even with my height (was usually the tallest in my class), even with my looks (was always one of the finest boys in class according to girls) and my congenial nature (I was always friendly and liked by almost everybody). With all these qualities, I noticed I was the kind of guy all the girls liked but never wanted to date. On the other hand, the rude, bad boys got the finest girls in class while the nice guys including me went on break alone while the bad boys always had a girl or two hanging around them during break or even after school.

Fast forward over 10 years since then it has remained the same (girls haven’t stopped loving bad boys) but what has changed is my nice guy status. I now consider myself a very good bad boy and as you guessed it, I get the girls now…lol

But why do girls like bad boys? I have asked many girls and coupled with my research come up with a few reasons.

1. Genuine: I asked a girl a while back why she liked me knowing I was a bad boy and she replied “at least I know you are bad and not promising me the moon and the stars but for nice boys, I am not sure if they are truthful or just pretending to be nice to get what they want”. Bad boys don’t pretend while nice guys seem to always have an ulterior motive for their niceness.

Are all girls attracted to bad boys

2. Unpredictability: A girl once told me that her reason for liking bad boys is that their level of unpredictability keeps her on her toes. She believes nice guys are boring and very predictable. He’s always doing everything right and never wants to hurt her but for bad boys, the thrill is that she doesn’t know what to expect tomorrow. Is he going to shout, or rough handle her during sex. That unpredictability spices up the relationship according to her.

quote-Ian-McShane-the-bad-boy-always-more-fun-226758

3. Respect: Bad boys gain more respect from ladies than nice guys because nice guys are simply too ice to a fault. You know how a nice guy wouldn’t dare raise his voice to his woman even when she insults or disrespect him. You dare not talk back at a bad boy or else.

1338132358111_393627

4. The challenge: Nice guys don’t give girls any challenge because they are already nice and caring and sweet etc. Bad boys don’t know how to be all that mussy stuff. Girls want to boast of how they changed a bad boy, how they made him good, how they made him stop sleeping around, how they made him theirs, how they made him focus on just them. This is the challenge that bad boys give girls and that’s why they love them.

images (2)

5. Escapades: The truth is that this reason I am about to give shows how very differently girls are wired from guys. As a guy, I never want to hear what my girl had been up to in previous relationships. I don’t want to know who she had sex with or how they made love. I’m too jealous for all that and most guys are too. But on the other hand, girls ALWAYS want to hear a guy’s sex stories, his bad boy tales, his mind blowing escapades and guess who has more of those thought provoking stories in store; the bad boys.

good-girls-love-bad-boys-19

6. Commitment: It seems to men that women are commitment focused but the truth is that many women are afraid of commitments. Women who have a fear of commitment, those who just want to have fun or those who wants to be available and in-demand all the time find bad boys irresistible and sexy. Nice guys on the other hand are risky because they might fall in love anytime.

images (4)

7. Rule breakers: Bad guys are rule breakers and are very unapologetic about it while nice guys are strict rule followers. Lets take for example two couples. Jade and her friend Chisom got into a confrontation with a class mate who slapped both of them. Jade cried and reported him to her nice boyfriend Ikenna. Ikenna upon hearing, apologized on the class mate’s behalf, petted her and didn’t do anything about it. On the other hand, Chisom reported the classmate to her bad boy boyfriend Azeez aka AK-47. He didn’t even let her finish when he said “where is the fool?, I will teach him never to touch a lady talk less of my lady”. He called a few guys and processed to the boy’s hostel where they taught him a lesson. Some weeks after, the same boy slapped another girl but he dare not touch Chisom again. As a matter of fact, he greets her when he sees her. That’s the impact of a bad boy.

bad-boy

8. Masculinity: Bad boys know how to get things they want, either through hook or crook. Bad boys are very passionate and very confident and can’t be bullied easily. Above all, bad boys know how to handle a lady and make her happy.

images (1)

9. Good talkers: Bad boys knows what’s up on everything subject matter. They have that I-dont-give-a-damn attitude which girls love. A guy that knows what to say, when to say it and how to say it is a girl’s bread and butter.

images (3)

10. Special: Girls love to feel special but the thing about nice guys is that they made everyone feel special. Bad boys on the other hand don’t care about anyone (or so we believe) so knowing that this guy who doesn’t want a girlfriend and doesn’t take girls too seriously is into you is a chance to feel special.

98013-Every-Girl-Wants-A-Bad-Boy-Who-Will-Be-Good-Just-For-Her

NOTE: Guys, don’t be a bad boy, be the bad ass man who has his shit together. That’s sexier. 

download (1)