Date Your Wife and Marry Your Girlfriend

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“Date your wife and marry your girlfriend” – Kurtis Smith, 2015

I can’t stress the above quote enough. Let me break it down.

Date your wife: Most people enter into relationships for various reasons. For companionship, to be taken care of (women are mostly guilty of this), for the sex (men raise your hands), for social acceptance, to blend in or even because of boredom. Only a fraction of relationships that start on such shaky grounds ever reach the altar and even so only a small percentage of them last 10 years happily.

But imagine, a man sees a woman in her flaws and envisions “forever after” with her. He looks out for her best interest at heart. Builds her. Supports her. Forgives her. Loves and cherishes her. He is dating his wife.

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Marry your girlfriend: Then they get married. From that wedding day, the title changes from wife to girlfriend. We have made the title “wife” heavy with too much responsibility. A wife should be this. A wife should be that. Too much pressure. Instead he treats her like his girlfriend. He doesn’t make her to wash/clean/cook and all those wifely mumbo jumbo. He takes her on dates, makes love to her anywhere and everywhere, spoils her, cocoons her in unbinding love. He is married to his girlfriend.

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So remember, when next you envision marriage. Try it the other way around. Date your husband and marry your boyfriend. YOLO should actually be YOMO. You Only Marry Once.  Don’t make divorce an option. Marry your boyfriend/girlfriend today.

#CoupleGoals: IG—>>>> @timi_dorgu and @ife_x.

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Angry Feminists: When Women Can’t Cook

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I wonder what happened to the women who knew how to cater for their families and where actually proud of it. Now you mention “kitchen”, feminists will tag you a misogynist. .

We live in a world which has forgotten their “foundation”.

We live in a world where baking has nothing to do with the kitchen but a make up term.

We now live in a world fast food is the fast way to prepare family meals.

We live in a world where girls are afraid to slay common chicken but have no problem slaying to events. .

We live in a world where #pepperdemgang can’t even touch pepper with their bare hands because it’s “hot”.

We live in a world where girls know more number of sex positions than number of dishes they can prepare.

As I said feminists will call me misogynist to hide their shame but truth be told, a man that can’t take care of his family is a joke whereas a woman that can’t cook for her family is a joker.

 

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#DearFutureWife: 20 Rules For My Future Wife

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1. #DearFutureWife, wearing a waist chain is very compulsory. No excuses

2. #DearFutureWife, I know the difference between poundo yam and pounded yam so don’t even try fooling me.

3. #DearFutureWife, your younger sister or female friend can’t stay with us. The devil also works in mysterious ways!

4. #DearFutureWife, I have a calendar to monitor your menstrual flow so don’t even use period as a means to escape sex. Don try it.

5. #DearFutureWife, wrapper is banned in my house. Dress like a chic not an old woman biko.

6. #DearFutureWife, using our real names are banned in the house. Never refer to me as Kurtis, my name is sugar banana. U hear!

7. #DearFutureWife, any panties that covers ur ass chicks especially grand ma panties are not allowed in my house. G-strings or thongs or no panties. Simple.

8. #DearFutureWife, I’ll spoil you. I’ll spend on you. I’ll make you look beautiful. But on one condition, u work 4ur money but I’ll spend mine on u.

9. #DearFutureWife, we are wealthy doesn’t mean we spend anyhow. At the end of the month, we must balance the books.

10. #DearFutureWife, don’t use work as an excuse not to feed me. No “babe, ur food is in the microwave” talk. Its unacceptable.

11. #DearFutureWife, sex in the room is restricted to only once a week. Other days kitchen, car, parlor, bathroom n even generator house will suffice.

12. #DearFutureWife, I am mandated by section 3, subsection 2 of the love constitution to open doors for u. If I don’t, don’t get out of the car.

13. #DearFutureWife, let’s make sure we never sleep over a fight/disagreement. No settling, no sleeping.

14. #DearFutureWife, if u don’t have a car, I’m not permitted to have one. U can’t be entering taxi while I drive freely. The devil is a liar!

15. #DearFutureWife, hug another man only if your boobs are in your hand bag.

16. #DearFutureWife, don’t worry about my mother, you are my first and most important relationship.

17. #DearFutureWife, there must be a mutual respect btw u and my mum. I came out of her, our kids will come out of u. Love each other by force by fire.

18. #DearFutureWife, shaving is not a luxury but a necessity. It must be a smooth as a table if u want me to eat it. I’ll sure u get. Better pikin.

19. #DearFutureWife, what God can’t do through me should remain undone. Asking another man for money even ur father is an abomination.

20. #DearFutureWife, if your family is bold enough to ask for three sheets of paper full of bride price. They shuld prepare for 10 years of no chop money from me.

 

note Forgive the typos/shortened words, these rules were supposed to be for my BBM contacts but I was almost arm twisted into putting them on the blog. I hope you enjoyed it and I also promise to OBEY all 20 rules. Cross my heart.

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