5 Lessons A Car Teaches Men About Women

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In Africa, a man’s identity is tied to his car. An African man is aware that even before he opens his mouth, his car does the speaking for him. The Bible said “by their fruits, you shall know them” but in Africa, by their cars, you shall know them. A man knows the importance of not only being mobile but stepping out in a car that suits his reputation. So a car teaches a man how to treat a woman in the following ways.

1. Your wife is your identity: A woman is a reflection of her man and represents him anywhere she goes. A woman’s intelligence, poise, panache and beauty rubs off positively on her man. The same way people see your car before they see you is the same way people see your wife before they see you. An expensive, clean and presentable car drives into an occasion and everyone is at alert to see the big man that owns the ride.
The same way, a beautiful, well dressed, intelligent, funny, delectable woman would make people ask “who is this woman’s husband?”
A man should endevour to take care of his woman with even more intensity and vigor than he does his car.

2. Protect her: In a car’s life, it always has a guardian/protector. When it is made, the car manufacturer (Toyota, Audi, Mercedes) is the guardian. It then gets sold to the car sales outfit (Coscharis, Lawal Motors) becomes the guardian. From there a man buys it, and takes over as the guardian. Every car has a guardian. You will never see a good car packed on the road without someone looking after it.
Same with a woman, she always has a guardian. When she was born and grows, that responsibility falls on her father but as soon as she gets married, her husband takes over the role of her guardian.
Imagine a scenario where a careless driver bashes into the car of a man on a busy road in Lagos. The unlucky driver should get ready for either a mouthful of insults or a fistful of blows. No man would stand by and watch another man put a dent on his priced asset: his car.
In that same light, a man should protect and defend his wife even more than his car. Another man slaps/insults another man’s wife is a bigger insult to the husband of the abused woman. No matter what she did or said, no man should have the effrontery or audacity to touch your wife. Her fault or not. Teach him a lesson. Protect her.

3. Refuel her: A car no matter how beautiful or expensive it is needs to be refueled periodically for it to move the owner from one place to another. No man in his normal senses would drive a car far more than the fuel in the car would permit. But the same man that is aware that his car needs refueling would have a wife and not refuel her periodically. A woman’s fuel is attention, appreciation, admiration, care, love, words of affirmation (I love you, you are the love of my life etc).  A man that ignores his wife is as stupid as the man that drives a car to a distance of 50 km on a fuel of 10 km.

4. Brag about her: A man with a beautiful car never stops talking about it. He is with his friends and you hear things like “do you how much I bought that car? do you know the car hasn’t had one fault since I bought it?” Men are braggadocios in nature and pride themselves on telling people about their achievements and a man’s car is a major achievement. If the car could hear all the nice things men say about them, it would smile.
Men ought to brag about their wives in that light. Tell people how she made you a better man, how she makes you a happy, how she takes care of you. She might not be present when you say all these nice things but people that hear them will respect her better and it will get to her ears somehow (people talk). No woman would hear that her man speaks so highly of her outside and not walk with an extra spring in her steps. Women love to be appreciated. Never take that for granted.

5. Regular servicing: A smart car owner knows that for his car not to develop faults and remain road worthy, it needs regular servicing periodically. A woman also needs servicing on a regular basis.
i. Sexual servicing: When a man is too busy to sexually satisfy his wife, he is doomed. A man should never be too much of in a hurry to avoid foreplay. He should never be too boring and keep repeating the same sexual routine all over again. He should never be too dull to only have sex in the bed room (where the kitchen, sitting room, bathroom, car, hotel rooms still exist). A man should never fail to add to his sexual audacity. Surprise her often.
ii. Psychological servicing: A man should not wait for Valentines day, Wedding Anniversary or even his wife’s birthday to take her out and give her a treat. This should be done on a regular basis. Go out and buy clothes for her and bring them home without her asking. Book a couples only vacation. Buy her that shoe she admired in that magazine. Spoil her often and she would adore you forever.

Show me your car and I can tell how wealthy you are but show me your wife and I can tell the kind of man you are. Treat your wife with even more care than you treat your car because remember you can change your car to a bigger or even better brand but you can never change your wife. Be smart.

7 Things Women Want (Part 7): Care

beautiful girls

This is a continuation of the series, READ:
Part 1: Acknowledgment
Part 2: Affirmation
Part 3: Attention
Part 4: Affection
Part 5: Security
Part 6: Communication

A lady wants to know for certain that you care about her. Caring connotes caring about her to the smallest element of her life. This includes her well being, her family, her education, her career and many more. A lady is not supposed to want something and have to ask you all the time for you to realize that she wants something. When women want something from their man, they give out clues to that effect. Its only sensitive men that care enough to pay attention to the clues she is giving out and get her what she wants. For example, a lady wants a new phone, she will give her spouse clues like “baby, this my phone is not good, its always having problems, its always crashing, the battery is bad”. She doesn’t have to come out straight and say “baby, please buy me a new phone”. She has given you clues, if you can’t get her a new phone, buy a good fairly used phone. If you can’t get her a phone at all, then take her phone for repairs. Caring to a lady doesn’t always have to be financially motivated, caring includes helping her with work, helping her with assignments, helping her get the groceries, helping her around the house. Ladies love men that genuinely care about them.

7 Things Women Want (Part 6): Communication


This is a continuation of the series, READ:
Part 1: Acknowledgment
Part 2: Affirmation
Part 3: Attention
Part 4: Affection
Part 5: Security

Relationships don’t exist in a vacuum. They exist between two emotional human beings who bring their own past experiences, history, and expectations into it. Communication doesn’t only include everyday ‘surfacey’ topics like (“How were the kids?” “How was work?” “How’s your mother?” “What have you eaten?”). You need to communicate more important things to her, you need to communicate your future plans with her, you need to communication your fears, your regrets in life with her. A woman loves an open and genuine communication with her man.
Being open means talking about things you may have never talked about with another human being before in your life. It means being vulnerable and honest with your partner, completely and unabashedly. It means opening yourself up to possible hurt and disappointment. But it also means opening yourself up to the full potential of all a relationship can be.
To communicate better and more effectively in your relationship, you don’t only have to talk. You can communicate in other ways — through your actions, and nowadays, electronically too (through BBM, Whatsapp, Skype, Twitter). Genuine and honest communication with your woman makes her feel part of your struggles, success, pain and joy. Talk to her about you. Honestly.

Continue–} Part 7: Care

7 Things Women Want (Part 5): Security


This is a continuation of the series, READ:
Part 1: Acknowledgment
Part 2: Affirmation
Part 3: Attention
Part 4: Affection

Every woman and I mean every single woman wants security. Security can be subdivided into 3 segments.
A. Financial Security.
B. Emotional Security.
C. Physical Security.
A woman desires a financial secure relationship, she also wants an emotionally secure relationship and she craves for a physical secure relationship.

A. Physical Security: Have you ever wondered why ladies like tall guys or well built guys? Have you ever wondered why ladies are not attracted to short guys or guys they are taller than? In most cases, ladies like tall and well built guys because there is a feeling of security they feel when with them. They feel secure around them. They feel the tall or well built guy can protect them when and if the need arises. The irony is some tall or well built guys are cowards and will run faster than you if they smell danger while some short guys will kill for their lady. As long as you can stand up to anybody in defense of your woman, she will feel physical secure around you.

B. Emotional Security: A woman wants to be certain that she is the only woman in your life. A woman wants to be sure that she has a future with you. A woman wants to be certain she is not wasting her time in a relationship. A woman wants to know you will be there for her through thick and thin. If you have to hide your phone or password your phone when she is with you means there is something wrong somewhere. If you have to go out to answer certain calls means there is something wrong somewhere. Remind her of her importance in your life and do that as often as you can.

C. Financial Security: Last but definitely the most important to some ladies is financial security. A woman wants to be sure that you can take good care of her. That you can take care of your family. In most cases, even if the money is not showing now, she wants to be sure you have the desire, the dream, the zeal, the aspiration to be financially stable and in turn take good care of her.

Continue–} Part 6: Communication Part 7: Care

7 Things Women Want (Part 4): Affection

sweet ladies


This is a continuation of the series, READ:
Part 1: Acknowledgment
Part 2: Affirmation
Part 3: Attention

A woman needs affection, she needs love in the total package. First of all, there should some form of affection in your words. When she calls or you call her, sound excited to hear her voice. Make it look like hearing her voice just brightened your day. Let her feel the excitement in your voice when you both converse on phone.

Another way of showing affection to a woman is by little physical contact. Women love physical contact with someone they cherish. Learn to hold her hand when you both are watching a movie or walking on the road or at the beach. Learn to peck your lady. I didn’t say kiss but peck her as often as you can. In my own description, a peck on the forehead means “I adore you”, a peck on the cheek means “I cherish you”, a peck on the neck means “I appreciate you”, a peck on her lips (a peck not a kiss) means “I love you”. At first, peck her and tell her what it means. After a while she will know what each peck means, so most times you don’t have to say the words, a peck at a particular place on her face sends the message. Affection could also include putting your hand on her leg in a non sexual manner when talking to her or when driving or when watching a soccer match. It could also include putting your hand across her shoulder when walking or when looking at something together.

Lastly, affection could be sexual (married couples only). Make her feel like sex is not what you do only when you are horny or what you do only when you both want kids. Make her think of having sex with you at work and run back home just to get a quickie. Don’t make your sex life boring with the bed only routines. Do it in the kitchen, do it in the bathroom, do it on the beach, do it in the parlor, do it in car. Spice up your sex life by changing styles and doing at least one new thing every time. For men, sex is a short distance sprint while for women its a long distance race. A woman’s body is filled with so many nerve endings (sexually aroused spots), take your time to maneuver these spots before you enter the promised land.
Remember affection should be 80% nonsexual and just 20% sexual, don’t touch your wife only when you want sex. Touching her makes her feel special and important to you.

Continue–} Part 5: Security, Part 6: Communication Part 7: Care

7 Things Women Want (Part 3): Attention

wana be cute

This is a continuation of the series, READ:
Part 1: Acknowledgment
Part 2: Affirmation

Women love attention.
Women need attention.
Women crave for attention.
Most times it doesn’t matter who gives them that attention but women love being noticed that’s why they dress well or try to look good even if they are just going across the street to buy maggi. Attention to a woman is like saying “I am important to you”. Attention from her man will make any woman feel loved and appreciated. When a woman talks to her spouse about a problem she is having, in most cases its not for the man to proffer solutions but for the man to give her a listening ear (attention).

Therefore men, whenever a woman talks to you about a problem she is having just listen and keep making remarks like “hmmmm, ahhhhh, are you serious?, wow, you don’t say, really” until she finishes talking. Don’t tell her what to do about the situation till she says “so what do you think I should do?”. Then and only then should you offer advice but I can bet you that in most cases, she already knows what to do, she just wants you to hear about it. Let’s imagine a lady spends so much time in the salon making her hair, even if you are watching a football match, she expects you to leave the match for some time and notice her new hair before returning back to your match.

No matter how busy you are, you should always find time to check on your spouse and give her the attention she craves for. You need time to build any relationship, if you don’t have enough time for your wife then don’t get married yet.

Continue–} Part 4: Affection, Part 5: Security, Part 6: Communication Part 7: Care

7 Things Women Want (Part 2): Affirmation

fine fine ladies

This is a continuation of the series, READ:

Part 1: Acknowledgment

Its not a secret that women are moved by what they hear while men are moved by what they see. A woman is unsure of many things in her life. She is unsure of how she looks, how perfectly drawn her eye brows are, how nice her hair looks and smells, how she looks in a dress etc-No wonder they are always with their makeup bags and mirror all the time.
A lady is also uncertain of her place in your life, of your love for her and if you value her above all other beautiful women. It is a man’s duty to reassure his lady with his words and actions. Women need to be reassured on a daily basis of how wonderful, beautiful and special you think they are. Don’t wait till her birthday, or your anniversary or even Valentine’s day to remind a woman of your love for her.
The Bible says in Lamentations 3:22-23  “The mercies of the Lord are new every morning” meaning yesterday’s mercies are not enough for today so God makes available brand new mercies every morning. We can relate this verse to reassurance as the compliments of yesterday is never enough when dealing with a woman. You must learn to compliment her everyday and as often as possible. For example, a lady spends 5 hours in the salon and you don’t compliment her hair? Now that’s a crime in my opinion. It is a criminal offense for a lady to spend so much time making up, getting dressed, brushing her hair and looking good for an outing with you for you not to notice and acknowledge her. Every time you have an opportunity to compliment your woman, take full advantage of it because it’s your compliment that matters the most to her.
When a woman cooks, make her feel like the best cook in the world. When she takes care of the kids, make her feel like the best mum in the world. When she takes care of you in bed, make her feel like the best sexual partner you have ever had and will ever want (for only married couples plssss..lol).
Wake up in the morning and say words like “I just love you, I am ready to wake up every morning with you by my side for the rest of my life, you make my life complete”. In the afternoon you spice it up with “baby, just called to tell you how much I miss you, how much you complete me, I can’t wait to leave this ‘boring’ work and spend time with my princess”. At night, you add it up a notch with words like “you are the air I breathe, you are the one for me, you make me the happiest man in the world, you make living without you seem impossible”. When you make your wife feel good, you will reap the dividends.
Words are powerful and even more important to women. Women are more sensitive to words than men do so never use your words to bring your woman down. Never ever use your words to belittle her! Never compare her with other women because she is the only authentic piece of her there is and will ever be. Always lift her up with your words.

Finally, here is a secret I always love to share. ‘Your woman will act the same way you make her feel. If you make her feel like your queen, then she acts like your queen. Plant love and reap love.’

Continue–} Part 3: Attention, Part 4: Affection, Part 5: Security, Part 6: Communication Part 7: Care