Date Your Wife and Marry Your Girlfriend

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“Date your wife and marry your girlfriend” – Kurtis Smith, 2015

I can’t stress the above quote enough. Let me break it down.

Date your wife: Most people enter into relationships for various reasons. For companionship, to be taken care of (women are mostly guilty of this), for the sex (men raise your hands), for social acceptance, to blend in or even because of boredom. Only a fraction of relationships that start on such shaky grounds ever reach the altar and even so only a small percentage of them last 10 years happily.

But imagine, a man sees a woman in her flaws and envisions “forever after” with her. He looks out for her best interest at heart. Builds her. Supports her. Forgives her. Loves and cherishes her. He is dating his wife.

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Marry your girlfriend: Then they get married. From that wedding day, the title changes from wife to girlfriend. We have made the title “wife” heavy with too much responsibility. A wife should be this. A wife should be that. Too much pressure. Instead he treats her like his girlfriend. He doesn’t make her to wash/clean/cook and all those wifely mumbo jumbo. He takes her on dates, makes love to her anywhere and everywhere, spoils her, cocoons her in unbinding love. He is married to his girlfriend.

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So remember, when next you envision marriage. Try it the other way around. Date your husband and marry your boyfriend. YOLO should actually be YOMO. You Only Marry Once.  Don’t make divorce an option. Marry your boyfriend/girlfriend today.

#CoupleGoals: IG—>>>> @timi_dorgu and @ife_x.

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How To Spend and Still Be Richer


It was December 2013 and I was standing on the terrace at Old Trafford with a Ronaldo-esque pose, my hands aloft and a beaming smile across my face. This was really the theater were dreams did come true.

As a young 10 year old boy watching my favorite team come back from a goal down with few minutes to spare and winning the 1999 Champions League final against Bayern Munich in such dramatic fashion. Now standing on the tuff of the same team I have spent almost 2 decades supporting and it was surreal and one of those pinch-yourself moments. One that would surely go down as one of my greatest ever memories (asides my future wedding day and the birth of my future children).

Looking back at my foremost experiences such as touring Old Trafford in Manchester and watching my younger siblings graduate from the University. All hold greater relevance to any physical thing I have and will ever acquire.

People long to acquire whereas they should long to experience.


Using a 20-year study conducted by Dr. Thomas Gilovich, a psychology professor at Cornell University as an anchor to address this belief system.
He pointed out that experiences become a part of our identity. We are not our possessions, but we are the accumulation of everything we’ve seen, the things we’ve done, and the places we’ve been. Buying an Apple Watch isn’t going to change who you are; taking a break from work to go on holiday to The Bahamas most certainly will.

“Our experiences are a bigger part of ourselves than our material goods,” said Gilovich. “You can really like your material stuff. You can even think that part of your identity is connected to those things, but nonetheless they remain separate from you. In contrast, your experiences really are part of you. We are the sum total of our experiences.”


We don’t compare experiences in the same way that we compare things. When people are asked if they’d rather have a high salary that was lower than that of their peers or a low salary that was higher than that of their peers, a lot of them aren’t sure. But when they are asked the same question about the length of a vacation, most people choose a longer vacation, even though it is shorter than that of their peers. It’s hard to quantify the relative value of any two experiences, which makes them that much more enjoyable.

We get used to new possessions. What once seemed novel and exciting quickly becomes the norm. The new phone you were dieing to get last year suddenly becomes old this year and you aspire to get a new phone. We keep raising tpurchases lead to new expectations. As soon as we get used to a new possession, we look for an even better one.

Possessions by their  nature foster comparisons. We buy a new car and are thrilled with it until a friend buys a better one—and there’s always someone with a better one.

The paradox of possessions is that we assume that the happiness we get from buying something will last as long as the thing itself. It seems intuitive that investing in something we can see, hear, and touch on a permanent basis delivers the best value. But it’s wrong.

The temporary happiness achieved by buying things only provides “puddles of pleasure.” In other words, that kind of happiness evaporates quickly and leaves us wanting more. Things may last longer than experiences, but the memories that linger are what matter most.

In this decade, the next and even the ones coming up, my first visit to Old Trafford (Manchester United’s football stadium) would forever remain a memory I would cherish. In the same vein, all the phones I have had, shoes, car or house would pale in comparison to that one experience.

Strive to have fun not to have shoes. Work to rest not to buy. Love to build not to get.

Why You Should Spend Your Money on Experiences, Not Things By Dr. Travis Bradberry


An Unforgettable Experience in Dar es Salaam


Reginald Mengi, Tanzania’s richest man once said “everything you see is the product of someone’s imagination or dreams” and nothing echoes that thought more than the city where he has made most of his millions: Dar es Salaam. This beautiful city formerly the capital of Tanzania holds the enviable status as the richest city in the East African nation. Dar es Salaam with literally means “residence of peace” is not only Tanzania’s largest city but its most formidable tourist attraction. Boasting a population of over 4 million people, the city is touted to be the third fastest growing city in Africa (after Bamako and Lagos) according to City Major.
This growth in terms of population, capital and infrastructural development is not unconnected to its economic potential and its budding tourist attractions. Dar es Salaam is filled with fun filled spots, museums, markets, beaches and islands that will surely become a part of you somehow on the famous words of Anita Desai. Let’s dive straight in.

The Kariakoo market which is the busiest and most thrilling market in the city is an ideal place to start your sojourn into the wonders of the city. The market guides you into the authentic side of local Tanzanian products and opens your eyes unto the wonders inherent.

things-to-do-in-dar-es-salaamAnother beautiful market to visit is the Dar es Salaam fish market where hundreds of different delicious fishes are sold and even auctioned off. If you are not a lover of fish, I bet this market would make you crave for some.

dar-es-salaam-coco-beachFor those looking to get their groove on, I will recommend a visit to Coco beach also known as Oyster Bay. The beach popular in the city is usually packed with Tanzanians, Africans and even Asians looking to dance to beautiful African songs, eat hot local food and enjoy the night away. Many beautiful ladies abound to wet the appetite so ladies hold your man very close.

The most beautiful and serene places to see in the city are the islands for sure. The Bongoyo, Jangwani, Mbuja and Kigamboni islands are a beauty to behold with their accompanying beaches littered with gorgeous sceneries. Surely a great place to unwind in your hut while enjoying grilled fish, drinking and live music.


After having so much fun, its time to get down to serious business as an academician would say. A visit to the National Musuem of Dar es Salaam should be top of your agenda. Here you learn more about the rich history and culture of Tanzania which is sure to leave you captivated.

Other gorgeous places to visit include Puga Hills Nature Reserve and the Village Museum. The latter offers you a chance to observe a number of typical styled Tanzanian traditional huts and learn more about the tribes of the country.

dar-es-salaam-mwenge-carvers-villageThe Mwenge Wood Carver’s Village is another tourist spot not to be missed with locally made Tanzanian handicrafts begging to be snapped up for friends and family back home.


The Tingatinga Art Center which is famous around Africa for its rich display of artworks is a must visit spot.

For the religious, the Azania Lutheran church and St. Joseph Cathedral on Sokomie Drive are beautiful cathedrals to behold and worship in or simply visit.

home-slide1For lovers and families, the Kunduchi Wet ‘N’ Wild Water Park which is the largest water park in East and Central Africa will bring joy into the hearts of your loved ones with its colorful mix of pools, playgrounds, fast food restaurants for everyone.
I could go on and on about the lovely sights in Dar es Salaam but as they say “seeing is believing”. I would like to give you the privilege of discovering other gorgeous spots yourself and I must tell you, there are a lot.
A visit to this East African city would convince you and please make sure you don’t over stay your visa while having fun.



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References For More on Dar es Salaam, visit: